Devil’s Music

"Anger towards oneself? Why are you angry at yourself? You went through a childhood exposed unilaterally to domestic violence, didn't you?"

Geon, looking out the window, responded to Carlos's puzzling question.

"At that time, I was angry about my own powerlessness to resist. Of course, I resented my father. I was not old enough to fight back, and he was strong."

Carlos felt the change in Geon's mood and listened quietly. As Geon saw the bare branches outside the window, he continued,

"I hate that my life and my thoughts are filled with resentment towards others. I won’t resent anyone, even if circumstances force me to. It’s nothing more than a vile and lowly emotion."

Carlos frowned and said,

"Is that really your honest feeling? If I were in your shoes, I might not have been able to do that."

Geon turned to look at Carlos.

"It's not my honest feeling. I wrote in my diary several times a day that I wanted to kill him. My diary still at our home in Korea says that when I grow up and become strong, I will surely kill him."

"But why? Your honest feelings are real, aren’t they?"

Geon remembered the words of Birashi he met in Nepal.

'Sing of forgiveness. Forgiveness is the role of a king, while revenge is only the act of the lowly. And love. It’s impossible to grow wise by loving someone and at the same time, but try loving the world instead of an individual. Loving only oneself makes society rough and desolate.'

Geon smiled faintly and said,

"Those who harbor resentment towards others ultimately resent themselves. Choosing resentment as a way to release one's inner anger is nothing but a lowly act."

Carlos briefly watched Geon and then smirked, though his worry did not disappear as he added,

"Well, you’re right. But if you explode in self-anger as you say, it might turn into ‘self-blame’. You know that self-blame is more foolish than resentment, right?"

Geon nodded with a deep smile,

"Of course, I understand. Blowing up in self-blame is different from anger. Don’t worry, I’ll make sure they are different."

Relieved, Carlos glanced at the crumpled scores Geon had and suddenly asked,

"You said you would change the performance for the live show? Are you planning to perform live? You said you wouldn’t. You hadn’t scheduled it for that song aside from the album, had you? If you suddenly schedule it, you’ll need to rent a live hall. It’ll be at least four months before it’s available for a live show, what are you planning?"

Geon turned his head to look at the woman sleeping on the sofa across from Kevin, who was also asleep. Carlos followed Geon’s gaze to the woman and Geon revealed his teeth in a grin,

“The person who can be most helpful is right here.”

Relaxed from the tension, Lynn, who was dozing off in an uncharacteristic manner, half-opened her eyes and looked towards the bed upon noticing Geon and Carlos’s gaze on her.

"Huh? What is it?"

Both Geon and Carlos burst into cheerful laughter at her reaction. Meanwhile, Gregory, who had heard the laughter of Geon and Carlos from outside the room, stood up.

"Can I come in now?"

As Gregory reached for the door handle, a man who seemed to be a member of the organization rushed up to Miroslav and said,

"The lady has just come out."

Gregory paused his action and turned his head.

"Where should I go?"

"She’s coming up from the psychiatric ward on the second floor."

"Got it, thanks for your efforts."

Gregory, looking slightly tense, hurried to the elevator. In the general hospital with eight elevators, he hesitated where to wait before quickly approaching an elevator as it dinged and stopped. The door opened, and Kiska appeared in Byung-jun's arms, making Gregory smile brightly and reach out his hand.

"Kiska! Daddy’s here!"

As Kiska heard her father's voice, her ears perked up and she quickly turned her head. Seeing Gregory’s smiling face, Kiska let go of Byung-jun's neck and stretched out her arms to Gregory. Gregory, beaming with joy, picked up his daughter, pinched her cheeks, and checked her for any bruises.

Byung-jun, intimidated by Gregory, hesitated to step out of the elevator and fumbled until he quickly grabbed the door as it began to close. Realizing he was obstructing the door, Gregory stepped back apologetically.

"Oh, sorry."

"No, not at all!"

Byung-jun quickly moved to Miroslav's side. Having often chatted and smoked together, Byung-jun was a bit more comfortable with Miroslav. Gregory, feeling Kiska's tiny fingers,

looked at Byung-jun and asked,

"Are the test results out?"

Byung-jun took a step forward, lifting one arm towards Geon’s hospital room.

"Let’s talk inside."

"Aright, let’s do that."

As Byung-jun ran ahead to open the door, Geon, Carlos, and Lynn looked towards him. Seeing Byung-jun, Geon was about to ask about Kiska's well-being but changed his words when he saw Gregory following.

"Ah, Gregory! You’ve come?"

Holding Kiska, Gregory smiled.

"Yes, how are you feeling?"

"I’m fine, but what did the doctor say? Is Kiska alright?"

Geon looked worriedly at the girl, and Gregory, with a gentle smile, turned to Byung-jun,

"I should hear it now too. Oh dear, our Kiska has gotten quite heavy. Is there somewhere to sit···"

Gregory looked around and saw Kevin lying on a three-seater sofa. Miroslav approached Kevin and shook him awake. Kevin, who seemed exhausted, turned over but did not wake up, prompting Miroslav’s brow to furrow as his large hand moved over Kevin’s face. Seeing this, Byung-jun quickly whispered,

"Mi, Miroslav! It's better not to touch him."

Miroslav paused his hand, ready to punch, and looked at Byung-jun, who was sweating coldly.

"Touching him might bring missiles from Red Castle."

Miroslav twitched his eyebrows and looked at Kevin again before slowly getting up, feeling the sweat on his back. Byung-jun, feeling the sweat, squeezed between Miroslav and the lying Kevin and sat directly on him.

"Uh!!! Wh, what?!"

Startled Kevin flailed his arms as he saw Byung-jun sitting on his stomach and looking down at him and exclaimed,

"Manager! What are you doing?"

Byung-jun stealthily stood up as Kevin got up and looked at him with an annoyed expression. Gregory, who had just taken a seat next to Kevin, said,

"Now a seat is available."

Kevin, unsure what to say to a stranger, touched his face trying to regain his composure as Byung-jun whispered into his ear,

"I just prevented a war between America and Russia."

"What? What are you talking about?"

"Such things happen."

Kevin stared at Byung-jun, who was talking nonsense, and then suddenly noticed Geon and ran towards the bed. Holding Geon's hand, Kevin, with tears welling up, exclaimed,

"Kay! Are you alright? Do you know how worried I was?"

Geon gently pulled his hand back and smiled,

"You were worrying but you were sleeping rather well?"

Kevin sweated and made excuses,

"Ah.. no, that’s because I had been practicing all night yesterday···"

"Ha ha, alright. We have important things to discuss now, so let’s talk later."

"Huh? Oh··· alright."

As Kevin stepped aside, Byung-jun stood up and said,

"First, to satisfy everyone’s curiosity about what Kiska said, after that one sentence in the hospital room, she just shut her mouth again. The psychiatrist tried to engage her in conversation for a whole hour but she didn’t respond except through gestures."

Gregory, patting Kiska’s buttocks while holding her, asked,

"How is the examination result?"

Byung-jun, holding Kiska’s neck close to him, glanced at her and said,

"They found nothing abnormal. The doctor said it's not that she can't speak, but that she chooses not to for psychological reasons."

A flash of guilt crossed Gregory's face as he stroked Kiska's little head, knowing the story of Kiska’s mother. Everyone who knew looked at Gregory’s expression and felt pity, falling silent. After a brief silence in the room, Gregory lifted Kiska to meet his eyes. He looked into her large eyes for a while and said weakly with a smile,

"Daddy will always wait. Someday you’ll speak to me. Don’t rush, just wait."

Kiska blinked her large eyes and looked into Gregory's eyes. Gregory, observing his unresponsive daughter for a while, hugged her again and said,

"So there’s nothing wrong, and she doesn’t need to be hospitalized?"

"Yes, that’s right. She wasn’t originally brought in for being sick."

Gregory turned to Geon and asked,

"What about Kay?"

Byung-jun, with his hands on his hips, said,

"He needs to be hospitalized for a few more days. Nothing abnormal was found, but if there’s an impact to the brain, it should be monitored for at least three days."

Gregory nodded and spoke to Geon,

"That’s probably best. Take a good rest. I’ll be going now."

As Geon tried to get up, Gregory shook his head vigorously and raised a hand

,

"Just lie down. I’ll see you when I get back home."

Gregory, holding Kiska, stood up from his seat, and as Kiska squirmed, Gregory looked down at his daughter and chuckled before placing Kiska on Geon’s bed and speaking to Miroslav,

"Ha ha, Kiska seems to want to stay. Miroslav, could you please take care of her?"

Miroslav nodded,

"Leave it to me."

"Alright, then I’ll be going."

Gregory left the room somewhat forlornly, followed by Miroslav who was seeing him off. Kevin, watching their backs with displeasure, asked Byung-jun,

"Who are these people? One of them looks pretty fierce."

Kiska stared at Kevin as he heard her. Kevin shrank his neck and stammered,

"I mean···.just···"

Geon chuckled and said,

"Are we just··· a choir of angels, Cyril? Ha ha ha"

Kevin, looking sheepish and watching Kiska's reaction, laughed awkwardly.

>

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